Mona lisa, lend me your smile...

Dry your eyes pretty girl, you're too young to be feeling this pain, this rediculous pain. You're much to kind to be falling in the hands of drug addictions, sex, and booze. You're much to smart to let yourself be used by the endless string of men that touch your body instead of caress it. You're much to fragile to press that blade to your wrist and scream inside your head what you fear to scream aloud... And yet, you allow this. You allow life to grab you and shake you as if you weren't born to stive. You talk so much about being strong, about not caring what people think, about loving yourself, and yet here we are... here you are, a messy, crying, red-eyed, swollen lip, bulimic, wrist cutting girl with no self-esteem. A girl, that's what you are, you aren't a woman, a real woman stands her ground and let's no man have their way with her. A real woman loves who she is, every hair, every scar, every stretch mark on her body. A map, that's what it is... a map, the marks on ones body tells visitors of the life they've lived, where they've gone, and what they've done. So why are you still despising yourself? Why must you treat what God has given you with such disgrace? Brush the hair off your eyes, wipe your tears and smile. You have too much love to share, too much love to let it go to waste. Smile Mona Lisa, your life has just begun...

Ma hard on.

Dear, Overly active hormones.

I am writing you this letter because my left ovary hurts so much from you letting that slut fuck the shit out of you today. Oh, not to mention my inner thighs, and part of my lower spine. I think you should cut me some slack and stop presenting yourself at the sight of every mans organ. Please and thank you.

Sincerly, Grace.

Dear, Menstral system.

Go die.

Best wishes, Grace.

Christmas fallout.

I personally find writing about the person I'm madly inlove with is a bit.. inifintile. So I'll write about the many I've fallen in love with considering I'm still young... Now, as you see the title to this post was clearly done in Holiday spirit. It is, Monday, April 26 2010 and since December my views haved changed. I must say my heart is a warrior... You keep stabbing it and it will stand, stay. Kind of like a cockroach being bombarded with nuclear missiles. I can't count the number of heart aches I've had, but I can count the number of 1 night stands. I wish that for the 4 hours I spend with the guy I met at the club, I could feel love instead of lust. I wish I could stare into the eyes of the love of my life, and see him starring right back at me, his soul pouring into mine. I could really use a wish right now...

Forgive me father, for I have sinned.

Now, if I were really taken seriously by everyone... I wouldn't have the need to pour my heart out! So first I'd like to say, fuck you all, and second, fuck myself for allowing it. Life has given me many chances for friends, from the Jennifer's to the Amita's.. Love, from the Johnathan's to the Jason's, Jason's to the Carlos', Carlos' to the Avery's. And future, from sober days to tripping on shrooms. Sigh.. when will the trials end? When will the obsticles finish? When will I be able to finally sit down and put my feet up? I'll tell you fucking when. Never. Never because after you're finished dealing with one piece of shit step in your life you're fucked with the another, and if you do shit with the first, the second comes 20 times harder. So all around you're fucked. No es-cap-e. Oh, so you think you CAN escape it? You think praying will help you!? You fucking think that being nice to that dumb ugly fat slut will help you escape the gripping hands of karma and fate!!!?!?!? You got some fucking nerve!! Do you know how much I've tried praying every fucking sunday so that I could get some light in my dark path, or tried turning the other cheek when that slut rags on you for fucking the guy she sucked off! What else is there to fucking do when everything goes down hill.. Who is there to show you the fucking God Damn light. NO FUCKING ONE. It's fend for yourself or fuck yourself my friends. Life is a fucking test, deal with it. Only the brave and strong survive..

Shalom.

No, I'm not Jewish... I just like that word. This isn't my first blog. Actually, I've written many blogs but haven't realized them.. I'm a writer... for my age... I'm a fucking good writer. Things trail along in my mind... things that shouldn't be said.. things that people don't care to hear.. and things that I don't care if people want to hear. I am a writer. It's what I do. It may be a bit egotistic to even label myself as that... But then again, I'm a fucking good writer. Note and memorize this.. "I decided that it was not wisdom that enabled poets to write their poetry, but a kind of instinct or inspiration, such as you find in seers and prophets who deliver all their sublime messages without knowing in the least what they mean." - Socrates. You decide to label, and to judge.. I'm just here writing.. 'cause it's what I do..